I’m about to start my 12 week paternity leave next week thanks to a state program and almost everyone that I’ve told has had their jaws on the floor that I would even want to do that.
Today I witnessed a group of coworkers almost bragging how little time they took after their kids were born. I’ve heard stuff like “Most men are hard working and want to support their families so they don’t take leave”.
To me it was a no brainer, I’m getting ~85% of my normal pay and I get to take care of my wife, our son and our newborn for 3 whole months. and for someone who hasn’t taken a day breathe in the past 3 years I think I deserve it.
I’m in the US so I know it’s a “strange” concept, but people have seemed genuinely upset, people it doesn’t affect at all. Again, it’s a state program available to almost anyone who’s worked in the past 2 years, I’ve talked to soon to be dads who scoffed at the idea and were happy to use a week of pto and that’s it.
I feel like I’m missing something.
What you’re missing is some men legitimately hate their wives and children and dislike spending time with them. Others drank the coolaid of American capitalist propaganda. Your child will only be a newborn once and your wife will need the help. If anything you should be normalizing it by telling all your friends and colleagues how great it is and how happy you are to get to spend that time with your family. Never shut up about how awesome it is. Expound at length about the many benefits you personally enjoyed thanks to your time with your new child. Every man you convince makes the world a better place.
When I was born my dad worked for himself, he was never home and I can remember running away from him crying cause my mum was leaving the house. He found permanent employment by the time I was 2 because of this.
These men are fuckwits and will wonder why they don’t have or struggle to form a relationship with their children in later life.
If you hate her why would you marry or have kids with her? Its completely optional to have a wife or child.
I guess because people fall in and out of love, which is natural, so they start a family and later everything changes. Also because people’s personality changes with time and because they tend to conform to social expectations.
Social pressure. “When are you getting married? When are you having kids?”
For some people, that’s enough to push them into doing it.